calling

There has been an on going question taking hold of my mind, body, and soul the past few days that I have been oblivious to until this moment.  Everywhere I turn there seems to be something, anything, everything asking me the question of Am I listening???

Am I hearing God's voice above all the noise and ruckus that is my worldly life?

Each day God has slipped in little nuances telling me to listen up.  While in the Grand Canyon reading and lounging at a secret spot a family was also enjoying the 300 degree view of the canyon from a spot farther away from the drop-off of the edge of the rock.  After a while the father decided to bring his son out farther to see just how magnificent the canyon really was and also to grab a quick picture.  Now, seeing as the dad was a tad bit afraid of heights, he was continually issuing commands to his son making sure to keep him safe.  He was overheard saying, "Sit still! Don't move! Keep your feet right there!" and my all time favorite he questioned his child to see if "his listening ears were on."  Not knowing the effect this would have on me his little son replied "they are at 101!"  Looking back on this interaction now I fully understand why this stuck out in my mind, God (my Father) wants me to constantly have my listening ears tuned all the way up to 101.  Since I so much crave child-like faith, I have to remember just what it felt like to be a child always having to listen to my parents who love me unconditionally and who tell me things that help me along the way.

This morning I found myself in the book of Numbers and, surprise surprise, I found myself wondering if I am really listening.  In Numbers 22-24, God speaks out to a pagan prophet known as Balaam.  This raised a lot of questions in my head: Since when did God talk to those who totally went against His covenant, against his laws?  (I had just gotten done reading Leviticus so all those rules, regulations, covenants, and laws were fresh in my mind.)  So, as my mind churned over this newly found information I wondered if since God spoke out to Balaam and called him to recite what he had been told, then God has got to be trying to do the same in my life... But, then why am I not always hearing what He has to say?

I want to know how God is moving, I want to know what He is thinking, I want to know of all His beauty He has so freely given.  So, why am I not hearing a lot of this?  I find myself distracted very easily by the sounds of the world.  I find my mind wandering to the plans I have for myself that day or the worries and struggles I will have to overcome.  I begin to have feelings of jealousy or want over material things.  I forget to turn to God, my Savior.  For it is said, "surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid.  The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation" Isaiah 12:2.

God is my song, He is the noise that I want in my life.  Lord, help me get rid of the excess loudness that is surrounding my every thought every action.  Help my life become simple, with You my only focus.  Remind me to turn my listening ears all the way up to 101.  Amen.